Men could actually be driven to more disturbing sexual images following David Cameron’s clampdown on internet pornography, a leading think-tank has claimed.
The Prime Minister’s measure of compelling internet service providers to make pornography opt-in is designed to limit the effects of the extremes of pornography.
But the Institute of Thinking and Researching Stuff has claimed it could actually increase sexual extremism, as people develop out-of-the-ordinary sexual predilections in searching for alternatives to censored conventional pornography.
The Institute’s Dave Wheeler said: “Remember those times where you go on some natures-y holiday or where your internet goes down for a week or so, and you’re forced to… improvise for your pleasure, let’s say – this is what these new porn laws will be like for many people.
“And it won’t just be the standard knocking one off to the lingerie section of the Argos catalogue either. Our research shows that people will graduate onto cookery shows, property shows, even newsreaders – hoping they don’t cut to images of Syria or something half-way through.
“No part of normal adult life will be left untouched – literally.
I’m telling you, society needs ‘hot horny milfs getting anally annihilated’. They’re a great safety valve for society’.
Bloke A agreed, and defended pornography on unusual grounds – feminism. (He deigned to give his name, partly due to embarrassment, partly thinking being a man was sufficient qualification to speak on the subject).
He said: “All these feminists want us to look at women not just as sex objects but for their talent and intelligence and stuff, right?
“But us men think about sex every three seconds, isn’t it? So how is it possible to look at women in a nice, non-sexual way without porn?!
“If we can’t actually see Busty Kendras as naughty young doctors, we’re going to start visualising all doctors – and teachers, and scientists, and high-powered executives – like that. And all the time – not just most of the time, like now.
“We can’t help it. It’s evolution…I think.
“Would feminists want that situation?! I don’t think so…”